Taintless
by Boyzenberry Erai
Summary: Shuichi x Tohma. When Shuichi betrays Yuki, it seems he will pay the fitting price. But when someone is there to help him get back on his feet, will he only be there for that, or so much more?
1. Heartbreak

**RKS Productions: Disclaimer: Gravitation does not belong to me**

"**Taintless"**

A Gravitation story of a forbidden love!

Shuichi closed his eyes quickly expecting a blow to the head, but instead opened a single eye to look up at the unexpected scene. Tohma Seguchi stood, his back before him, and Yuki's fist directly in his chest. The older blond collapsed, coughing up a bit of blood, as he held his sides, purely in pain.

"Tohma. You of all people should know not to stand in my way." The novelist growled walking around the fallen angel to the other player and kneeling before the shivering vocalist. "And you, damn brat! Dare betray me!?" He scowled, lifting Shu's chin between his fingers roughly. He brought the younger boy closer to kiss him roughly, forcing his tongue into Shuichi's mouth.

The young child tried to protest, but was only met by Yuki's cold hands encircling his neck, cutting off the little air he had.

It only took a few seconds before Yuki was drug back by the older blond, roughly. "Don't you dare harm him, Eiri. He is your toy no longer." Tohma growled from behind, trying to ignore the blows to his chest and stomach from Yuki's shoulders flying back on him. "S-Shindo-san…get out, now!" he coughed, watching the small vocalist scamper into the hallway and hearing a door close from the same direction.

"Tohma-san…" he whimpered, pleading that he would be ok.

_Shu's POV_

A few moments passed before I heard a knock at the door and thought of the only two things it could be. One being Tohma, the other, Yuki ready to rip me heart directly from my chest. I got up slowly, but realized my legs denied me the access to walk when I fell to my knees with a following thud.

A few moments later, Tohma was in front of me, looking into me hurtful eyes as his own filled with pain. I realized, he was here and I smiled inwardly, knowing it might just be ok. He kneeled down and took my chin in his fingers, much lighter then when Yuki had done so.

"Shuichi-san…I am so sorry. I didn't think Eiri would act against you in such a manor." He spoke softly to me. I wanted to say something, but it seemed my voice had been scared. Tohma took a small sigh and smiled weakly. "Yuki…" He paused, "Is gone. You don't have to worry."

I smiled softly while my body continued to shake slightly. I let a few tears run down my cheeks though unsure of their meaning. The sadness and loss of Yuki? Or the fast that I had Tohma? I really didn't know…

_End of Shu's POV_

Tohma kneeled down before the younger vocalist and caressed his cheek gently. "Shuichi, I am dearly sorry." He said as his hand paused, just allowing the other to rest in his palm.

Shuichi whimpered softly, both his heart and body burning. His heart burned for the love that was fading and far too quickly reappearing in a completely different form; his body ached, for the abuse that rained down on him constantly and came to a sudden halt.

"T-Tohma…"

The older keyboardist pressed his finger to the vocalist's lips to keep him from speaking. "Rest, Shindo-san." He said softly as he pulled his finger back and pulled the younger youth onto his lap.

Shuichi cried softly as he hurled up in a tight ball, lying in Tohma's lap, his eyes closed tightly. "Don't say sorry…" He spoke gently. "It's my fault for-" he cut himself off, unable to speak the words he wished to.

Tohma's eyes filled with sorrow, knowing exactly how the younger child felt. "It's ok…I understand." He said as he held back his own tears.

Shuichi slowly shifted his gaze to meet Tohma's eyes. How badly he wanted to tell the other how he felt, but was so scared of being hurt; yet again.

Tohma smiled weakly down onto the other one as he wiped his tears from his eyes then slowly his own.

"Shuichi. I love you." He said under his breath, trying his best to encourage the other boy to talk more openly to him.

Shuichi's eyes filled with tears as he herd the president of NG speak such soft words to him, but it was so hard to believe that he, a married man felt feelings for his brother in law's so called lover.

"Tohma…I-" He paused. He knew it would never work even if his love was returned. He curled up in more, diverting his eyes from the other's. "I love you…" He cried and whimpered, tears staining his pale cheeks. "Don't ever love me…unless it's to the fullest." He choked out. He would never allow himself to be loved if he knew it would not last.

Tohma gave the young vocalist a hug and rubbed his back comfortingly, wanting the other to trust him. "Shindo-san, dear Shu. I will not harm you." He whispered in his ear, protectively.

Shuichi shook his head in disbelief. "You cant! You're married, and love that damn novelist!!"

Tohma's face filled with even more sorrow. "Dear Shu…Mika has abandoned me for my money, and Yuki has harmed my best employee, loosing my trust. I'm here for you if you want me to be."

"No! Please!!" The vocalist cried out, his hands clenching Tohma's clothing. "I don't want to be alone again!" His violet eyes were now tinted red and as sore as his heart, the tears burning his skin.

"Calm down, Shindo-san. I told you, I'll be here for you, if that is what you ask for." He reassured the younger one. "I won't ever abandon you."

"Tohma…I can't believe you…I won't trust anyone but myself, if I…can…even trust that…"

"S-Shindo-san, isn't that a bit rash?" the keyboardist asked "Do you have a reason not to trust me? I'm assured you don't."

Shuichi wiped his tears away and gazed at the other. Tohma was right. He had no reason not to trust him. "………"

Tohma pulled the other boy into his arms and stood up slowly, holding him bridal style. "I don't understand you." He said softly, walking over to the bed, lying him down gently, not really wanting to let go of the young youth.

Shuichi's weak hands gripped at Tohma's sleeve, that was already ripped due to the earlier fight. "Shu…" he spoke softly as he gazed down at the other, regretfully. He moved his hand and entwined his fingers gently with the others. "Shindo-san. I really am sorry." He said softly, his fingers playing with the vocalist's. For allowing Eiri to harm you so."

The younger boy looked up at the other, sleep in his eyes. "Se-Seguchi-san." He said, his voice slowly returning, though hoarse. He crawled over and lied closer to the president, rubbing his own cheek against the face of Tohma's hand.

"Shindo-san…" Tohma said softly as he pulled his hand back and moved it to run his fingers through the boy's pink soft hair slowly. "You should apologize for being so irresistible." He purred softly, his hand moving to caress his cheek. "But I guess it can't be helped."

Shuichi was in no mood to hold a conversation with anyone. He closed his eyes and sighed as he realized he was crying once again. He nuzzled into Tohma's chest, hiding his newly born tears.

Tohma blinked, holding the other boy, his hand still entwined with the other's. "Shu, please don't cry. It doesn't suit you well at all…." He said gently, his other hand around the skinny waist.

Shuichi whimpered, only wanting one thing, surely not going to get it unless he acted. He slowly back off a few inches before wiping away his tears and leaning up, locking his lips with Tohma's, catching him off guard.

The older boy looked at the other, surprised and unable to react. His eyes softened as he held Shu firmly in his lap.

Shuichi kissed the older boy roughly, giving it his all so it would be good, at least while it lasted. He moaned softly, licking across his bosses lower lip, sliding his wet tongue into Tohma's hot mouth, as his teeth nipped softly on the flesh of Tohma's upper lip.

The younger youth continued to kiss him forcefully, not allowing Tohma to ever break the kiss. He cried out slightly, pushing Tohma on his back, laying on top of him, each leg placed on each side of the blonds body.

Shuichi pulled back and looked into the eye of the older, apologetically. "Tohma, I-I'm so sorry. I just-" Shuichi blinked as he felt himself being thrown back and being pinned down roughly by the other.

"No more talk, Shindo-san." Tohma Seguchi said with a slight hint of punishment in his voice.


	2. Punishment

"**Taintless"**

**RKS Productions**

**Chapter: 2**

A Gravitation story of a forbidden love!

"No more talk, Shindo-san." Tohma Seguchi said with a slight hint of punishment in his voice.

Shuichi gazed up at the other, fear filling his eyes. "T-Tohma?" he asked softly, his eyes wide and confused as he could feel Tohma's knee part his legs slowly.

"I told you, I love you…" The blond purred as he traced a finger down the others chest and rested just above Shuichi's groin.

The young vocalist took in a sharp breath as his whole body froze under the other's. Was this what he really wanted?

Tohma's hand slipped into the younger boy's pants, tracing his finger just above the other's member, teasing it as it slowly grew erect in exchange for the soft light touches across his delicate skin.

Shuichi winced, feeling himself only being played with. It reminded him of the way Yuki would start, but then leave him alone, completely erect and in pain. Would Tohma do the same? Was he really any different from Yuki?

His mind lost contact with his thoughts as he felt Tohma's hand slide around his half erect length and stroke him gently.

The vocalist let out a small winded moan as the older blond locked his lips with his own tenderly. The kiss was long and gentle, not rough like when Yuki was ever in ever in the mood for sex, in some cases rape.

The pink haired child closed his eyes as he began to kiss back. He raised his hips off the bed, pushing himself into Tohma's hand wanting as Tohma stroking the boy a bit more roughly, his hand sliding up and down the tender shaft.

Tohma kissed the boy tenderly as his free hand supporting himself inches above the other. He purred as he could feel Shuichi slowly began to get more hard in his hand, feeling pre-cum drop from the top.

"My, my, Shindo-san. Do you like me that much?" He asked the younger boy, kissing down his neck, as the others head drifted back, allowing him more access.

Unable to answer the blonds question he let out a deep moan, keeping his eyes closed tightly in bliss. He whimpered, as he could feel himself growing near the edge but dying to try and keep it from ending.

"Shindo-san…" Tohma teased, whispering into his ear with a howl, sending shivers down his spine and through his length.

Shuichi began to whimper more, his body coated with sweat. How could it be possible that such little pleasure could send him over the edge and into pure bliss? He cried out, finally releasing into Tohma's hand. His seeds spread over his chest and waist as he looked up at Tohma, panting softly.

Tohma smiled softly as he pulled his hand back and leaned over licking the boy clean, slowly with his tongue. The younger boy opened his eyes slowly, lookind down at the other when eh stopped.

"Tohma…" he said softly, his eyes watering still from the attention.

"Shindo-san. I just-" He closed his eyes and chuckled softly, recalling the moment. "How…could I not, really?" he replied to the best of his ability.

Shuichi blushed softly, almost taking it as an insult as he quickly covered his body with one of the sheets from the bed, looking up at the other. "Will…you leave me now?" he murmured, a small sense of fear in his voice.

Tohma looked up and blinked. "Shindo-san. I can't leave you after this." he began. "If I do, Yuki will surely finish his job. And plus…I think we can work something out for ourselves." he finished with a innocent smile on his lips.

Shuichi returned the smile weakly as he gazed at Tohma, pleased. "Thank you…"

Tohma sighed softly. "Well, I'm sure I can't leave you here." he said softly, hading Shu a new set of clothes, signaling their leave. He watched as the young vocalist got dressed quickly, surprisingly full of energy, even after everything.

Shuichi pulled on the jacket and looked at Tohma, almost confused. "Why… should I change clothes. It's not like they are dirty or anything…" he said, actually liking the clothes he had just out on.

Tohma looked at him with a sly smile. "Eiri has harmed you in them, and I'd rather you not wear them."

Shuichi blinked at him. "…uh…ok. But where are we going?"

"Just to a hotel for now. Somewhere that Eiri won't find us." He said walking out of the room, calmly, looking over his shoulder to see the other following close behind.

They walked through the living room where the recent beating happened, as Shuichi gazed at a new tear in the couch and the broken vase on the ground. "…Tohma"

The president of NG turned and looked at the young beauty, struck with fear. "S-Shindo-san, what's wrong? "He asked, turning completely and approaching the other to see what scared him so.

Shuichi eyes gazed at a dark puddle of blood in the unlit room, a small kitchen knife beside it. He slowly looked up at the other, not knowing if Yuki was running around hurt, or if his savior was hurt, but refused to show it.

Tohma winced a but not at pain, but the face that Shuichi now knew that one of them were hurt. "I…don't know. I'm sorry. I just wanted to assure your safety." he said softly, walking over to the vocalist and raises his hand to caress his cheek. "Listen. It can't be that bad, and there is nothing we can do about it, so let's go."

"……" Shuichi stayed silent and nodded his head, taking hold of Tohma's hand and walking with him out of the home and away from the soon to be haunted house. Why? Cause the memories in there will forever remain not the best.

Hours later, the two shared quite the large hotel room and quite the raindrop blossomed. Shuichi lied on the bed, exhausted, and still scared of his ex finding him. He closed his eyes and curled up in a ball. Lying on his side. He looked over at Tohma, who was just on the balcony, looking out over the large city of Tokyo. Shuichi opened his mouth to speak but Tohma smiled softly at him.

Tohma looked over his shoulder at the other. "You know…you can see NG from here." he said softly. "Tokyo Is one of the most populated cities in the world and quite beautiful at night…" he said softly. "So much happens in the city alone. But who knows what happens outside of Tokyo…outside of Japan. We may think we're in a deep situation. But somewhere out there…someone has it worse."

Shuichi looked at the other, taking in his words as if they were holy. "Tohma…" he said gently, getting up and walking over to him, looking out over the same view. He placed his hand over Tohma's on the railing. He closed his eyes and rested against the older. "Thank you…for everything..."

Tohma blinked and blushed softly, looking down at the other. "Shuichi…" he said in a ghost voice, pulling the other close in a small hug resting his head on top of the others. "I will keep you from Eiri, no matter what the costs." He assured the other, keeping him close to his chest. "I will protect you, and keep you in my site at all times. I promise you…"

Shuichi's face turned a light pink, hearing the other speak so openly about him. "I don't want anyone to get hurt because of me again. Not even you…" he said softly, looking up at Tohma, his eyes watering. "How can I be so sure that the blood I saw wasn't Yuki's? It's like you to hide something like that from someone close to you."

"Shindo-san-"

"Tohma! Please…just assure me that you're ok…" the younger boy pleaded, everything running through his mind, knowing that anything was possible.

Tohma moved to hold the other tightly, but winced at the sharp pain, taking the other in his arms, hiding his face from Shuichi. "…I-I'm fine, Shuichi…" he said, his voice rough. "Aslong as you're ok…I…am."

Shuichi eyes widened in fear, feeling the other get heavy, collapsing on him. Shuichi hit the floor, Tohma on top of him, passed out. "Tohma…you liar!!"


	3. Regret

"**Taintless"**

**RKS Productions**

**Chapter: 3**

A Gravitation story of a forbidden love!

Shuichi eyes widened in fear, feeling the other get heavy, collapsing on him. Shuichi hit the floor, Tohma on top of him, passed out. "Tohma…you liar!!"

Shuichi sat near the edge of the bed, the smell of bandages and something like decaying flesh loomed in the air. "……"

All he could think of was the pain his new lover was going threw all because of him. Why did he have to be so damn stubborn all the time? I mean sure, he was also only lying in a hospital bed with a stab wound in his chest, all because of his stubbornness.

How could he have not seen something so simple before? Damn, Tohma was good at hiding things from others. He could be dying and no one would know because he would simply smile.

The young vocalist extended his arm and rested his hand on top the other's securely. "Tohma…" he spoke softy, rubbing the back of Tohma's hand with his thumb gently.

The other didn't respond, but that was already to be expected. He had been there by his side since last night, and yet again it was growing dark. It had been just over a day since the accident, and it was only feeling like a few hours. He closed is eyes and slowly drifted to sleep, but only soon after a familiar voice interrupted his thoughts.

"Shu-chan??" a calm childish voice called from the room's doorway.

The younger boy looked over slowly, setting his site upon his idol, Ryuichi Sakuma who in truth did not look too great himself.

"Shu…why are you-" he cut himself off, seeing tears in the other's eyes. He slowly walked over, embracing the other tightly. "Shuichi…" he whispered, caressing his back.

Shuichi blushed deeply, slowly releasing Tohma's hand and held onto the other.

"Ryu!!" he cried out, tears streaming down his cheeks.

The older vocalist slowly looked over to his sleeping band member on the bed, putting the puzzle together. "Come home with me." he whispered, resting his head upon the others, his eyes closed.

"I don't want to leave him…I need to watch over him…"

"Visiting hours are almost over and you need to stay with someone… Shu… please." Ryuichi pleaded, holding him protectively.

Shuichi slowly nodded his head, agreeing to stay at least a single night with the other. "Thank you…" he whispered, his tears subsiding.

"Then let's go."

Shuichi pulled away and looked over to the sleeping angel. "Thank you Tohma…for protecting me…" he whimpered as he leaned over, kissing him innocently on the lips. "Love…you."

Shuichi held the blade tightly in his hand as he felt the tip run down his wrist with a crimson line trailing behind it. He winced slightly as he pulled back and dropped the knife to the bed provided to him.

"Yuki…" he whimpered. Yuki. Yuki could have prevented all of this mayhem if only he was good enough of a lover to him. But really to the core; was it himself? He was…annoying, was he not? He was warned…it was so obvious! But still he loved him…

Blood ran down between his fingers and palm, tainting the bed below his thin frail body that was slowly going limp.

Pain streaked up his arm from his wrist in small jolts so intense it was almost pleasurable to him in a strange way. His mind was nearly blank; all but he pain and the fear of Ryuichi walking in. Though it didn't matter; he would see the scars and blood stains on the sheets in no time.

Slowly, picking the weapon up again, he only inflicted more wounds upon his body Would he die? Possibly from blood loss; or would he take his own life in a single thrust of the blade? One way or another, pain was involved.

Minutes turned to hours as he continued to punish himself for the things even he was unsure of. Now the bed was covered with his own liquids of sweat, blood and cum. Guess pain was another form of pleasure. And poor Ryu, his reaction when he found everything out. There was no way to hide it.

Shuichi winced as he applied more pressure to the cloth dangling from his chest; his violet eyes closed tightly, trying not to allow his tears to show. His chest slowly rose and collapsed just as slowly as his tears began to show with each agonizing release of his lungs.

The older teen opened his eyes and gazed down at his bare body, then to the bloody knife lying before him. Why did he ever have to chase after that blond novelist? Because of it now he could just-

"Shuichi."

The pink haired novelist jumped and looked at Ryuichi who was standing in the doorway. He looked so serious, so hurt, so…lifeless.

"If I didn't know of your situation, I would probably kick you out for being so reckless."

Shuichi looked down, no able to look at the other. "R-Ryu…"

"You have no right to do this! Yuki is no longer in your life and Tohma is alive! What if he woke to find you dead, then what!?" he felt bad for harassing the other, but it just…seemed right.

Shuichi could feel tears come to his eyes. He was right. Completely right. But did that make him _completely_ wrong?…What kind of question was that? He was **completely** wrong!

He slowly looked down at the bloody mess he had created as he whispered, half lying threw his teeth. "Ryu…I'm sorry…"

"I'll call the hospital, you need attention for those wounds." Ryu sighed, pulling his cell from it's charger just outside the door and quickly dialed 911. After a short conversation he hung up and groaned, looking at the other. "Tohma will be upset…" he said just before the sirens got louder and were in the driveway of his house, there for Shu.

Ryuichi stood against the hospital wall, looking over at the pink haired child who was getting stitches all over his body. Reckless indeed, that he was. He sighed and slowly walked out of the room and over a few to check up on his band member.

"Tohma…you have to wake…is seems this world is tainted without you…Shuichi's body tainted with blood…because of your absence…he needs you." he whispered, standing before the bed. "Please…open your eyes."

Nothing happened. But words could never cure anything. In the end it was all actions. Tohma needed to see Shuichi. Shuichi needed to see Tohma. Alive or dead.

Shuichi limped over a few minutes later, and looked at Tohma. "…" He couldn't talk. He could if he waned to, but he just didn't want to.

Ryu looked to the other and sighed. "Shuichi…"

"Leave me alone…I know I did wrong…ok?" he cried out softly, knowing all his actions were the complete opposite of what he should have done.

Offended, Ryuichi just sighed and walked out of the room, and over to Shuichi's vacant room.

Emerald eyes opened and looked into a watery violet pair, a weak smile spreading across his lips. "S-Shuichi…"

"…"

TBC.


End file.
